jordan year
As we grow old, the more we should be grateful to God's faithfulness.
..so in a few days time I'm gonna have to celebrate my 23rd year. since last year, I've been planning to celebrate it in a fashion that will benefit others, not just me. been wanting to celebrate it with the less-fortunate kids, perhaps some institution in Tayuman. but obviusly I am not a good planner neither a good money-saver. maybe that's why I am not that looking forward on my birthday because it would be just like the past years where I would treat the people who could very much afford more than three meals (hehehe), it's not that I am bitter about it neither I dont want them around, it's just that I think it is about time to share to those who cant afford it 
. I've been blessed, too blessed I must say. He is faithful to provide me with everything, maybe not the things I want and rant about, but the things I most certainly need.
Promises must be kept, deadlines met, commitments honored; not just for the sake of old-fashioned morality, but because we become what we do (or fail to do), and character is simply the sum of our performances.
... being able to celebrate my 'jordan' year is a gift in itself. I take it as a miracle that I still get to celebrate life despite everything... so as the day approaches, I asked myself, where am I after writing last year's bday entry?... have I examined my life enough to know where I am going? have I reflect more about life and living? have I learned how to take risk in order to put things in perspective? have I chosen to grow up?... well, well, well... I'm still in the process of finding the answers.... still in the process of sorting things out. and still in process of accepting and letting things go... still in the process of changing...
as one research says, you need to do things 21 times in order to make a habit. thus.... quitting bad habits must be exercised 21 times and so is developing new ones. I'm not sure if I have already started my day 1 or will I start it soon. all i know is I should start somehow...regardless...
When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.
I suppose every person who gets to celebrate his/her bday has a list of "i-wanna-do", "i-wanna-have" and "i-wanna-be" stuffs... and I do have my share of those but imho [in my humble opinion] one won't be able to achieve even a quarter of it.... we only have enough time to be at one place at any given moment... and with this, I plan not to make any short-term wishlist for this year. I have too many things on my hand right now and I can't afford to add another one... (it's getting harder for me to outdo myself. it's not that I have to but most will agree that I am an ideal person and I think I'm becoming too ideal that I'm imposing too much...) After a year of pondering I came to realize that there are a thousand and one things we have no control over with. there's nothing wrong in making plans [in fact, I encourage you to have one], but I think it's best to have a plan and "plan to be surprised"... Indeed life does not look back. we all have to move forward and with that I [we] have to live my life taking steps, either full steps or baby ones, the important thing is I get to get going.... AND before taking the first step, I think it's best to know where He wanted me to be and follow the path obediently... "A life lived fully is a life lived faithfully", perhaps it starts with the willingness to change, and the courage to take the cross and gladly take the burden of the life one chooses.
why must I bear this pain?I can't tell; I only know my Lord does all things well. And so I trust in God, my all in all. For He will bring me through, whate'er befall
the year had passed had been a tough, rough, rocky, and pleasurable ride but the One up there is ever faithful to bring me through. there were a lot of changes and I expect there'll be more to come but I'll continue to trust in Him that He'll be right beside me all the time.... I noticed that when I started to hit the age of 20, my bday seems to be always fast approaching. and in that short and fast span of time, more events (perhaps more sad than happy ones) are happening that I can't understand and explain.. Life is indeed unfair. good things happen to both good and not-so-good people...and so are bad things... and we [I] tend to question that. little we[I] didn't know that in our[my] own myopic view, we can't understand all His ways. most of the times, we[I] just have to follow and trust that He know better.... He always know better than I...
A note to self as I add another year: The Lord does not just direct our steps but also our stops... one must be sensitive to His signs.... and He breaks people greatly those whom He will use mightily.
In the absence of a great dream, pettyness prevails.
I guess most people would want to know their purpose. and so am I. In that way I can put my life into good use rather living it only for my sake. I wish to find my calling and to be faithful in the place where He had put me, and to utter a prayer similar to MichaelAngelo's : "I hope that I may always desire more than I can accomplish."... I tols myself that I would go back to school ater three years of working and guess what, 3 yrs already passed. And somehow there is this urge in me to make it a reality. If God-willing, I plan to take up Masteral degree next school year. I'm hoping it would be in UPD, but we'll see... This is perhaps one of the few long-term wish/dream I have.
On a lighter note....
I love it when special events such as birthday fall on a Sunday. To start the day with a morning service makes me feel everything is going to be ok. Haven't plan much for 16th, since my mom just left for Taipei this week... My sisters and I will be watching Gary V @ 25 later at Araneta (as their bday gift 
) and then we'll have my [post] bday celeb when my mom get back, that is on Monday, next week. plans for the weekend? nada!. Prayer mountain sounds like a good idea or shopping sa quiapo? hehe
Josh is prodding me for a wish-list. Well, marami akong gusto pero I think they're all unnecessary so I have to think twice before wishing. As they say, "Be careful what you wish for" hehe.
1. Book: Inner Life (Andrew Murray)
2. Book: The Master's Indwelling (Andrew Murray)
3. Book: More than Conquerors
4. Book: FOR ONE MORE DAY (Mitch Albom)
5. Book : By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept (Paulo Coehlo)
6. Book: The Alchemist (Paulo Coehlo)
7. Book: The Zahir (Paulo Coehlo)
8. Earphones for Ipod
9. USB flash drive (4gb) 
10. Wii fit
Thanks Roan! You never failed to surprise me. happy bday to the both of us! this card surprised me yesterday :d
Posted at 02:37 PM in Personal | say something
)..anyway, i chance upon this song [same artists behind "The Man Who Cant be Moved"]... good lyrics and music.... i guess, sometimes we need no words, we just have to make do with what we have and learn from things and move along.